The Book Shelf

I have this book shelf and it's overflowing with promise and books. It's all the books I have yet to read or started and finished. It's prominently placed in my living room, so I can get easy access to books whenever I want to. And to remind me that they are there when I get to wrapped up in watching TV or working.

When I first conceived this book shelf, I looked at it with such delight and hope. It's my shelf of Books to read! All the books I want to read and all the books I feel I should read. You know, so I could be a good cultured man of the 2010's.

And through time, the book shelf has filled up with so many books; books were squeezed in and books were stacked on top. All kinds of great books have landed on this shelf; some are fiction, some are non-fiction, some are books on Gods and Man and Myth. Sometimes I will pick one up and skim a few pages or read the back or look for the chapter that I stopped reading and see if I remember anything. Then I'll put them back down.

But now I look at it in fear, and disgust with angry eyes. I hate these books, why won't they leave me alone. Why do they ask me to read them? And why I can't I just pick one? Why I can't I just sit down and start reading one? Is it that damn hard? Won't I keep reading if I start it? And everyday they just sit there, staring at me, taunting me. They keep asking me what's wrong with me, is it so damn hard to pick a book? And sometimes they call me a coward.

I hate that stupid book shelf.

MY TV FAMILY

Hello Friends & Family

I’m blogging to you from my couch this lovely Sunday afternoon, not feeling great, think I’m fighing off a sinus infection. Friends are out Cherry Picking, or going to the beach or having yard sales, and well, I’m watching TV on the couch. But I’m making the best of this weekend and have caught up on some of Season 5 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and also some Mad Men Season 2 and I also watched 2 episodes of Alias as well. And I decided I wanted to blog a little about my Favorite TV shows of all time.

A Little Preface before the list. What is it about TV shows that make it feel so different from reading novels or going to see the movies? Is it its weekly format? Is it the sitcom format, the weekly format, the highs and lows, the feeling that there are like 500 channels but really only like 5 things on that you want to watch. IS IT a good way to gather the entire family together. I don’t know… I do know you can tell a lot about somebody and where they are in their life by what shows they are watching?

A little background on my TV watching experience:

I have a lot of memories of watching TV with my family as I grew up. I remember getting home from school and watching cartoons and ridiculous live shows like the MICKEY MOUSE CLUB and MTV and then getting dinner and then TV with the family until it was time to sleep. Was this how it was for other people? Then I remember realizing one day I wanted to go watch my own shows at night, because I wasn’t interested in what my family was watching. I’m pretty sure I was kind of into doing my own thing even at the young age of like 8. I remember eventually getting like a little portable SONY TV and then breaking the antenna and sticking the CABLE jack into the Antenna and getting Cable in it. Amazing, and I would watch a Lot of sports and a lot of VH1 and MTV and anything else I could find, like bad tv shows on USA like Silk Stalkings and stuff, I was like a SPONGE for TV, little BJ staring at the TV. I remember having this meta moment while watching HBO'S Dream On, about a guy who watched so much TV as a kid, he can only relate to life through TV, and realizing oh god I could turn into that, maybe that would be terrible, but maybe not.

Eventually, I remember how TV became a community event. My buddies would come over to watch weekly shows like X-FILES and we would scare the bejeezus out of each other and stuff. And some other show became events, and even now can be a good time to watch some shows with others, when it's not too emotional or important to the arc of the show. But the TV watching cycle went on and on, until around 2000, where I stopped watching TV shows, and then watched a ton of movies… I mean I still watched some shows like Friends (really, wow, Friends?) but I had nothing to be invested in, nothing to set my week up around. Anyway….

So I guess what I’m saying, in a haphazard way is that a lot of my life has been spent around a TV, watching television shows, and maybe that’s why I only reserve TV time for sports, movies and specially chosen programs which I will run down here in a bit. And maybe that's why I'm not kind of not sure if TV is such a good thing, but whether or not it is, I think it's something we all kind of need, the serialized story telling, I mean. Like isn't Homer's the Odyssey like a long ass tv show, just told over a few nights...

In answering my question, from earlier, here’s what I have loved about TV which made it different from some of my other forms of entertainment. (God I need an Editor. Sorry if this doesn't make sense, I kind of have a headache.) I let these characters into my lives. I see them more then most people in my life, which is why I’m really picky about what I watch, if I don’t want to hang out with these characters I will not watch the show, and which is why MY List may have shows your list won’t, with a lot of overlap.

I don’t know, I, you, maybe you, develop a sort of relationship with them (see also Serialized Novels, Comic Books.) I mean, I feel kind of lame saying this, but like I would be really pissed if someone ragged on Buffy, you know… Really. Really. Pissed. And this is why I feel like you can learn a lot about someone by their shows. Do they crave romance, adventure, the humilation of others, a family they never had, the life they never had, is it all escape? Think about your shows? Hmm…

Here is the list of Shows that I’ve loved, cared about, and you know, think are worth giving your time, because they were definitely worth my time. I some order, but not really, other than Buffy, you know… And then there are all the other shows that didn’t make the top 10. I love them, well some of them, but you know… this is a retrospective look, how can I put some that are new or fresh in, when I’m not sure if they’ll hold up, or if I will forget about them.

1. Buffy the Vampire Slayer

- Like a stupid shining star. My brother likes to tell about this one time, he was just chilling in his room and then I came roaring in like a Mad Man, raging on and on, without making any sense, until he realized that I was talking about how HE turned record off on my Buffy Episode in the last 10 minutes. Then he started laughing.

- I thought the X-Files was good until I ran into a bunch of kids my age taking on Vampires & Demons while growing up. The relatability factor was way high. And it was so moving and not in a cloying way. It was never “On a very special episode of Buffy The vampire Slayer, Buffy deals with Sex.” No, every episode was a very special episode, but you didn’t know it. It was written for teenagers, it was written for everybody, and at the time I had no idea How Incredible this show truly was. Maybe it wasn’t until I realized that like all the other WB shows weren’t really this good or half as good, maybe that’s when it kicked in. Amazing.

- I stopped watching after Season 4. My life and their lives became so drastically different, it stopped meaning much to me. But now that I’ve gone back and watched it all, I can safely say, “My Bad.”

- I remember having Buffy & Felicity evenings with my friends. Amazing.

2. How I Met Your Mother

- This is my “Friends.” These are the people that remind me of who I hang out with and of my life as a late 20 early 30 year old. I bet I’ll be able to look back on this show when I’m like 40 and say, oh my god, my life was sooo much like that…

3. Veronica Mars

- This show made me want to go back to highschool in a bad bad way. It was like if I had been a mid-twenty year old watching Buffy at the time it came out. It was so well written. The characters were so so awesome and relatable. I think everyone could use a Veronica in their life.

- I speak only of the first 2 seasons. After that you’re on your own.

4. Bones

- The First 3 or so Seasons of Bones is fabulous. Wrenching, suspenseful, funny, great stuff. A little bit of something for everyone. Not like other procedurals, this show was rooted in character. The Team on this show feels like such a fantastically well rounded family, its like being at the best/worst job you could ever have. I will rewatch these seasons again at some point. Such good stuff.

- Of course now it’s just weird, weird with good ratings.

- Oh Bones. To see you lose your shine, is well, heartbreaking. Hopefully, you will return next season.

5. Battlestar Gallactica

- Damn You Battlestar. For being so good and sneaky. You started off as this bleak, adventure show that had a little fun and a lot of twists, and you ended up being ONE OF THE MOST DEPRESSING SHOWS ever, but I was hooked in, because if I had known, if I had known. The topics this show hit up, actually made you think. It was really really solid. A Show built on black and white that bled into grays, lots and lots of grays.

- For all of you who had problems with Season Four. Please rewatch Final Episodes of Lost and then rejudge the end of Battlestar. Just saying.

6. Arrested Development

- If you ever think your family is weird and fucked up, please see this show for something more. If this show wasn’t funny, it could have made the most heartbreaking, ridiculous soap opera ever. But this is hands down the Funniest 3 Seasons of Television, I’ve ever seen. I have never laugh/cried at a show as often as this one.

7. Firefly

- A Show about a rag tag of Space Cowboys going through time. I passed on it, when it came out. I’m A MORON. I truly believe that this may have been the synthesis show for Joss Whedon. The show he took everything he learned from Buffy & Angel and put together into a Haven of Awesomeness. But science fiction cowboys & girls was not something Fox or the mainstream public was into and so it died.

- Now OF Blessings and Curses, and the inability to change the past, I am in the camp that it’s a Blessing that the show ended after 13 episodes. Because there are an AMAZING/MIGHTASWELLBEPERFECT 13 episodes. They are so rewatchable its sick. I’ve watched them all like 3 or 4 times. And Serenity. Do I care that it’s flawed, no. Do I care that it tonally is different from Firefly, no. I just feel incredibly grateful that Universal is stupid enough to have made it. J

8. Alias

- The Show that brought me back to watching Television Shows.

- I have never devoured seasons of tv like Alias. I watched 22 episodes in 30 hours once. It was devouring done only on a level of New Harry Potter books.

- It’s a blessing and a curse that Season 4 started off with it’s own jump the shark moment. Because if you had loved the show through the first 3 seasons, you could instantly see and say to yourself, “Nope that’s it. I’m out.”

9. The X-Files

- The first show I really really liked. On my Own. In my Own way.

- How bad would this show have been without Mulder & Scully. Just think if it had been those other agents who took over late. What if they had been the agents at the beginning?

- For those who think that then end of Lost was terrible, please see the end of the X-Files and reconsider what Bad Is…

10. 30 Rock

- How I love the ridiculousness of this show. It’s so weird. And yet oddly relatable. From the genius of Season 1 Tracy Morgan, to the sustained awesomeness of Alec Baldwin, and the adorable, weird, and uncomfortably similar thought processes of Liz Lemon. I hope they keep coming and never slide into the abyss of well that dark place Tv shows can go. You know like… well… there is no need in being bitter, but suffice it to say, if the show goes to hell, I’ll still watch it.

So that’s it. If you have any questions about the shows, cause I’m super vague about what they are about, feel free to hit me up, or if you would like to add some of your favorites, post them up.

I’m gonna take a nap now…Hasta!

Two Boys on a Hill - 3 Vignettes

It is night and a full moon sits above two Thirteen Year Old's sitting on a hilltop surrounded by trees.

The first boy is Sean. The second boy is Jerry.

They discuss important things.

Sean - Favorite name for a fictional porno?

Jerry - Zombie Porn.

Sean - A Beginners Guide to Zombie Porn.

Jerry - The Zombie Porn survival guide.

Sean - Your Momma fucks the Zombie Porn.

Jerry - Your Momma um... shit. I'm out.

Sean takes a swig of the bottle off his Mother's 12 dollar vodka and looks up at the stars.

Sean - Man, I can't wait to leave home.

Jerry - Dude, we are never getting out of here.

Sean - No way, as soon as I'm eighteen, I'm leaving and never coming back.

Sean - Fuck this place.

Sean - A lot.

Jerry - I don't know. It's not so bad.

Sean - It's not so bad, because you've got a girlfriend. You won't leave her, or anyone woman for that matter.

Jerry - No, I'd totally leave her. We're not having sex.

Sean - Nah, you'd stay. Know why?

Jerry - Why?

Sean - Because of the promise of it.

Jerry - You know everything doesn't have to be about Sex and shit.

Sean - No It Is. Life is all about Sex and shit.

Sean - And war. Life is about war too.

Jerry - Dude, you are being really negative right now.

Jerry - And can you pass me the bottle?

Jerry takes a bite off of his sandwich.

Jerry - Do you think Transformer's 3 will be any good?

Sean - I don't know. They drop kicked Megan Fox to the curb, dumped her ass in a ditch, slammed her trailer park door behind her and she was the only reason i watched the first one.

Jerry - But the robots are cool.

Sean - The robots are always cool, but they might get boring in it. If they don't do something RIDICULOUS.

Jerry - Well that other girl was hot.

Sean - Who? Robo-Tongue? Shia's Mouth Raper? Only YOU would think that she's hot.

Jerry - Whatever, at least I've got a girlfriend.

Sean - And I've got the internet, which is better?

Jerry - Well. Shit.

Father's Day 2010

From Wikipedia:

"Father's Day is a day honoring fathers and celebrating fatherhood, paternal bonds, and the influence of fathers in society. It is celebrated on the third Sunday of June in 55 countries and on other days elsewhere. It is a widely known celebration."

Never really looked this up before, or even thought about it, for so long I really viewed as the day you bought your dad socks, or made him breakfast or gave him a phone call or so on and so forth... but really I think it'd be better to take your Dad, Granddad, brothers out to the bar and buy him a few brews or a share a cigar or go fishing or hunting or um something else like manly, and while you're doing it you can appreciate and honor the man who helped bring you into life and keep a roof over your head.

I would be curious about perhaps renaming this day, Man Day (and then everyone could go watch "The Expendables" together), because it does involve all Father's and Son's, but then that would leave out all the Daughters. And there are a lot of daughters out there and they might equally be interested in beer, cigars, hunting and Sly Stallone, and that would just not be fair. So it must remain Father's Day.

And also, until you join the bonds, the brotherhood of Fatherhood, you really don't have an idea what it means to be a Pops. Like for Reals, i don't even have a dog or a fish to be able to say I'm a big Poppa (Can anyone else see me walking into my place, feeding my fish and saying, "Who's your Daddy?"). NO IDEA.

So let me give a shout out to my own Father, because Father's Day Cards just don't really nail the sentiments I hope to express.

Dad, You got a Great Heart! You look to live a life of love and seek joy and contentment, and I have nothing but the upmost respect for that. I learned a great deal about the world and how it worked from you. Being a Father is no joke, it's hard and fraught with pitfalls and tough tough decisions. I wouldn't be Me without You, and I wouldn't take that back for all the world. Love, B.

And since we are honoring Fathers I'd also like to give a Shout out to my Brother.

Joe, you're the shit, you stupid git. You and your awesomely ridiculous jet Ski. Been thinking all weekend about how you took Friday off to go up to the lake. That is totally rad. Um, I should probably get to the Father's Day bit. As far as i can tell you rock as a Dad, your kids seem really happy and balanced and you seem to be disciplining your kids with a strong, yet fair hand and I can't wait to see how the kids turn out, cause I'm pretty sure they'll be something special. (Just remember to share that Jet ski when they're old enough.)

And on these terms,Father's Day, you know, I think I like you.

How was YOUR Yogaing?

Tuesday Morning.

I'm talking to a friend of mine after Yoga class and I notice this older Man standing by a building eyeballing me. I'm like, what's so interesting about me?

Anywho I get done talking with my friend and start walking home, when the Man calls out to me.

"Hey, how was the Yogaing?"

I stop and look at him hesitantly and think, did he say Yoga-ing? "It was good."

Now he's in, so he goes for it, "So I have a question for you?"

"Um, okay."

"Do Yoga make you skinny?"

OH NO, I think, not this question! I hate this question, it's always more complicated then yes or no. So I make a few "Uh, hmmm, um... well..." noises and then finally start rambling. "Well, not necessarily, I mean it is, er, can be a like cardio cause you can sweat a lot, but it's like not the best way to lose weight, and I mean if you really want to lose weight you should like, um, eat better and do like cardio at the gym."

After that, he looks at me confused, and then says, "But I always see Skinny People coming out of there." There being the yoga studio.

And I respond, "Yeah, well, okay, see, if you do Yoga a lot then you might want to get in shape so you can get better at it. It makes it easier."

The man smiles, he got his answer through my roundabout babbling. "Okay, thank you, thank you."

And I'm like, "Cool, well have a great day."

"You too, my friend." And then I walk off...

And I think, dammit, why couldn't I have just said, Yes Yoga makes you skinny, and then I'm like, well Yoga didn't really make me skinny, but it eventually worked it's little way into my head and then helped me, but I mean if I hadn't stopped eating crap or decided stupidly to train for a marathon, or gotten really sick a few times, that I may not have lost some of that weight. See, it's complicated... Okay, enough babbling.

Happy Saturday!

Can You Feel That?

Can you feel the music flow through you?

Can you feel the heat run over your skin?

Can you catch her eye as she passes by?

Can you ride that fire all night long?

For those of who can, there is only one choice: Courvoisier.

Now in three flavors, the Crib, the Club, and the Hotel Parking Lot.

Because a gentleman is never satisfied with just one.

MY 30th BIRTHDAY PRESENT, TO MYSELF

So for many of you, er, for those of you who were at my fricking awesome 30^th birthday party, you know that I’m 30. So in honor of turning 30, I thought I would do something special for myself; so I’ve decided to get Health Insurance.

Is that applause I hear? No, actually it’s silence, and questions, especially the most popular, “Wait, you don’t have health insurance?”

“That’s right,” I says, “I don’t got it, don’t need it.”

And then I hear back, “You playin’ with fire boy.”

And then I look back at them and say, “No, I’m playing with house money.”

Okay, I’m done with that.

Anyway, I’ve decided to get it, and I have a few plans, well the most important decision, I’ve had to make was to get Physical Therapy included. So I did some research and found a recommended Physical/Sport Therapist nearby named Dr. Mike.

And what do you know, he’s not unaffordable when you don’t have insurance. Dr. Mike is kind of the bomb in that way, (he’s kind of NOT THE BOMB, in his pushing you towards a healthy vegan, exercise 1 hour everyday, and do everything good for yourself and nothing bad, even the bad things that you really want, like the Rice Dream Mocha Sandwich, I will eat as soon as I’m done with this blog.)

After meeting with Dr. Mike, I have found that my hip bones are not balanced (because of my back pocket wallet?) and that I have a nerve going the wrong way in my lower back, which he was shocked to find out doesn’t really hurt me that much, but might be THE PROBLEM with MY KNEE!!! And also, I discovered that my lower spine bone seems to be a little misformed which was something that happened when I developed in the womb or some kind of trauma to my tailbone I don’t remember, although I kind of feel like I have this lingering memory of excruciating tail bone pain, but I have no idea if that is real.

So Dr. Mike adjusted me today, and hopefully I will be able to run again, which would be the best 30^th birthday present I could ever gotten.

And because of all this, this weekend I will apply for insurance without Physical Therapy but does have better Hospital and more Dr. Visits per year, but is 50 dollars cheaper a month. (I still don’t get that works, but whatever.)

So family, Grandma, you can relax, I’m gonna get covered.

~Will