Bojangling in Plymouth

Today is a quintessential Ryan Adams day. Dreary, misty, rain is a certainty and I know that the Sun isn’t going to come out and save me. I couldn’t sleep last night, body tired from too much, and too little, and from slipping in and out of time, and I couldn’t do anything. Sleeping in the suburban hidey-hole that my friend has crafted for his life.

So now I’m just kicking it in this coffee house, where the bathroom is painted like a tree house. Such a cool coffee house, makes me wonder what the hell is wrong with Los Angeles for not having anything so conceptually interesting yet simple, intricately crafted and at the same time so funkily bohemian. This is Plymouth, Michigan. Just chalk it up to one more thing that is wrong with Los Angeles.

I know I’ve got to go to Toronto, cause I booked housing, but I really don’t want to go anywhere or do anything. This feeling is hard to pinpoint, the effect is moodiness and the cause, I’m only half able to understand. It’s more that I really don’t want the present to propel me into the future, cause I don’t feel anything is really worth going towards. I know this moment will pass, and I’m not bummed by it, I just don’t want it and don’t want to do anything. I feel no excitement and I have no idea what might snap me out of it.

See a Ryan Adams day ain’t just about listening to Ryan Adams songs. It’s really about being locked into the mindset that so many of his songs take place in, and then his songs actually become uplifting, even the depressing ones. It’s not that I’m not excited about all the amazing things I am going to see, experience, it’s just that I can’t feel a damn thing. No Matter how much coffee I drink. It’s not that I hate all of the Los Angeles Coffee shops, it’s just that nothing is good enough when you feel like this. And even if I could muster an intention for today, I wouldn’t feel good about it, it’d just be, “meh.”

But I don’t feel too bad about this, because I know it will pass, in an hour, a day, hopefully not much longer, but it will and I’ll feel the inverse and it will be amazing. I think that’s just how it works. So just know, that right now, in this coffee house in Plymouth on a rainy Monday morning, I’m smirking.